PoetryCircle
ContemporaryPoetryForum
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.


« PoetryCircleThe WritingEditors' picks • Topic: A theft »
ThreadTools

Print







 (Read 452 times) [1]

  A theft
« on: February 05, 2010, 10:45:33 AM » by David C. Man
A theft is taking place,
although the universe
might call it repossession -
the dissolution

of one configuration
of walking talking atoms
back into the soup.
Gloop. Gloop.

This view is admirable
but hardly available
to onlookers like us.
We are standing too close

to the bigger picture,
we lack the necessary detachment.
Our view is local,
more achingly parochial;

the rest is sophistry.
We shall no longer see
ourselves in her sweet face.
A theft has taken place.
Logged

  Re: A theft
« Reply #1 on: February 05, 2010, 11:02:49 AM » by Tom Riordan
Lovely, cheeky sonnet, David! I don't care how many lines it has! L2-3 in last S so Shakespearean, and then that final line so perfectly not-quite Shakespearean. -Tom
Logged

  Re: A theft
« Reply #2 on: February 05, 2010, 11:09:37 AM » by cherylleverette
David, love the writing, the rhyme (I'm terrible at rhyme), love the form, and the way you move from one verse to the next.  The only thing I'm a little confused at is what has been stolen.  Just me of course, and my simple mind.

cheryl
Logged

"I have no intention of explaining how the correspondence which I now offer to the public fell into my hands....The sort of script which is used...can be very easily obtained by anyone who has learned the knack...."~C.S.Lewis

  Re: A theft
« Reply #3 on: February 05, 2010, 11:42:37 AM » by milner place
Love this, and love rhyme when it's subtly and artfully done (hate it when done crudely). A sure pick, later.

milner
Logged

'Caminante, no hay camino,
se hace camino al andar'
- Antonio Machado

Latest book 'naked invitation' $15 or £10, p&p inc milnerplace@msn.com

  Re: A theft
« Reply #4 on: February 05, 2010, 03:54:45 PM » by Lawrence Gladeview
david this is hook and harmony.  the varying pace is fun here, and especially enjoyed "achingly parochial".
lawrence
Logged


  Re: A theft
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2010, 01:10:55 PM » by milner place
Up she goes.

milner
Logged

'Caminante, no hay camino,
se hace camino al andar'
- Antonio Machado

Latest book 'naked invitation' $15 or £10, p&p inc milnerplace@msn.com

  Re: A theft
« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2010, 10:38:52 AM » by cherylleverette
David, just recently I was on the elevator at work with about 6 other people, and honestly, everyone on the elevator had earplugs in, a bluetooth, or a cell phone, and in their own world...except me.  I didn't even have my cell phone out.  Felt ssssooooo sssstrrrrange. 

I thought of this poem. 

cheryl
Logged

"I have no intention of explaining how the correspondence which I now offer to the public fell into my hands....The sort of script which is used...can be very easily obtained by anyone who has learned the knack...."~C.S.Lewis

  Re: A theft
« Reply #7 on: February 10, 2010, 12:36:40 AM » by Lynn Doiron
Much enjoyed.  I've read several times and wonder how it is that I come away feeling both a voyeur and a victim of loss/theft at the same time.  Extraordinary.

ld
Logged

My blogs:
http://lwww.lynndoiron.wordpress.com for memoir/journal/poetry

 (Read 452 times) [1]
Jump to:  
MemberTools

Home
Help
Calendar
Members List
Statistics
Login
Register



LatestNews

Get PoetryCircle on your smartphone or tablet.

SiteStats

182641 Posts
17371 Topics
1497 Members
Latest Member: Gregory DiPrinzio


Support PoetryCircle








PoetryCircle | Powered by SMF 1.1.15.
© 2005, Simple Machines. All Rights Reserved.

Simplicity design by BlocWeb