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i am
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i am
«
on:
July 09, 2010, 01:46:46 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
black as the bellies of crows
full and stretched and without
need
black as Orion's shadow
crouched under the moon
where purple flowers
grow
black as tire marks
on freeway walls
black as the smell
of coffee
black as life
when death is not available
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: i am
«
Reply #1 on:
July 09, 2010, 03:22:21 PM »
by
MichelleBethCronk
I would love to hear you read this one Tiko
what a collection of images....nice ending too - Michelle
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Re: i am
«
Reply #2 on:
July 09, 2010, 03:24:05 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
imagine if Mr. Snuffleupagus was reading it. that's me!
'heeey biiirrrrd'. :0)
thanks for the read and input.
tiko
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: i am
«
Reply #3 on:
July 09, 2010, 03:25:28 PM »
by
MichelleBethCronk
It's a pick for me, but I won't be greedy and take it yet - I should let some others read it...lol
M
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Re: i am
«
Reply #4 on:
July 09, 2010, 03:29:43 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
i blush like 'Telly' too.
thanks,
tiko
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: i am
«
Reply #5 on:
July 09, 2010, 04:11:01 PM »
by
milner place
Just bloody great, Tiko. If I weren't on leave I'd be apicking of it. But, of course, Michelle or another will send it up to where it deserves to be.
milner
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'Caminante, no hay camino,
se hace camino al andar'
- Antonio Machado
Latest book 'naked invitation' $15 or £10, p&p inc
milnerplace@msn.com
Re: i am
«
Reply #6 on:
July 09, 2010, 04:12:24 PM »
by
Jay Dougherty
This is fine, very fine.
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I do not like to write. I like to have written.
--Gloria Steinam
Re: i am
«
Reply #7 on:
July 09, 2010, 04:15:45 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
Gentlemen,
i am honored!
it's time for a cigar!
except it's raining! :-\
thanks for the pick, Jay.
thanks,
tiko
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: i am
«
Reply #8 on:
July 09, 2010, 04:39:57 PM »
by
cherylleverette
wow, tiko, what great compliments, and it's an awesome poem, the last two lines quotable.
good job,
cheryl
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"I have no intention of explaining how the correspondence which I now offer to the public fell into my hands....The sort of script which is used...can be very easily obtained by anyone who has learned the knack...."~C.S.Lewis
Re: i am
«
Reply #9 on:
July 09, 2010, 04:42:45 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
thanks, Cheryl.
quotable...such a fine thing to say.
thanks,
tiko
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: i am
«
Reply #10 on:
July 09, 2010, 05:40:08 PM »
by
Kevin Jackson
to quote milner, "bloody great" tiko... my friend you've penned a gem... a black diamond. those last lines are flying round my house like bats on a mission!
what a stroke of genius to lead in to those incredible closing lines with the familiar tang of coffee :)
k
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Find out more about me and my poems at
http://kevnjacksn.wordpress.com/
Re: i am
«
Reply #11 on:
July 09, 2010, 07:11:59 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
there are no short memories here. :)
thanks Kevin. glad this connected with you.
i'll be expecting pictures of those bats!
I hope they find their way into one
of your poems.
thanks,
tiko
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: i am
«
Reply #12 on:
July 09, 2010, 08:05:56 PM »
by
Tom Riordan
Tiko, love that S1 here too. Being "without need" has brought something beautiful tugging at my memory but I can't quite put my finger on what it is, or it may be one of those phrases that just seems like it's always existed. Tom
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Re: i am
«
Reply #13 on:
July 09, 2010, 09:23:31 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
Tom,
thanks. glad you liked it.
and, you will have to bring
the memory to my attention
when you've reeled it in
thanks,
tiko.
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: i am
«
Reply #14 on:
July 09, 2010, 09:42:32 PM »
by
Tom Riordan
My first hunch took me to the Song of Solomon, but though the spirit of your S1 does reverb well with SoS, the closest line I see there is "Thy navel is like a round goblet, which wanteth not liquor"!
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