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  Branching Out
« on: September 15, 2007, 12:04:25 PM » by Rick Stansberger
a Stark, Ohio poem


The Twins are branching out.
You can still see
their pink Porsches

side by side
at the No-Tel
on Friday nights,

but now there’ll be
a third car, or
even a fourth.

“They ran through
everybody at
the country club,” said

Addie at the Souper Bowl.
“They’re going out
to the Hideaway now,

even sometimes the DMZ.
Two horny rich blondes!
Must make some

of those old Vets
check their meds!” 
Addie laughed.

She has a nice laugh.
“They even came here
one day after school,

started talking about
afternoon delight.
Seemed to like my

tongue stud.  I thought
if I talked about
high school, it

would turn ‘em off,
but they just got
more intrigued.

So I grabbed this
fat hairy biker
that came in the door

and acted like he
was mine.  You could see
their wheels turning

thinking maybe they’d
invite him too,
but then they smiled

and left a nice tip.
I thought I’d have
a problem with the biker,

but when I explained, he
laughed.  ‘Oh them Twins,’
he said, ‘Had ‘em a time

or two myself.’”
Addie laughed again.
Dickhardt said, I

must be the only
one in town they
haven’t tried to boink.

“Consider it a compliment,”
Addie said.  “We’re
just peasants.  You’re

too smart.  They’re
scared you might
figure ‘em out.”

A third time she laughed,
and Dickhardt wanted
her to laugh forever.
Logged

Words . . . will not stay in place,
Will not stay still.

—T. S. Eliot

  Re: Branching Out
« Reply #1 on: September 15, 2007, 03:09:16 PM » by Jonathan Bracker
And I liked his a lot too.  Your tone is very warm, you eschew sarcasm and irony.  You like these people and make me like them too.  It was an interesting poem and one I'd reread (my test for a poem).  I wonder if your Stark, Ohio, poems are numerous enough for a chapbook; I'm sure it could be published.  I really like this kind of poetry, though my real joy is to read a fine lyric.  I wonder if you write some lyrical poems? am I being clear here, I wonder.  I certainly don't mean it as a put-down of your work.  By lyric I mean like Thomas Hardy.  I love WCW but few of his poems are lyric.  It is just one way of writing, and a case could NOT be made for it being the best; it is just the kind I find so rare nowadays.  Your colloquial poems -- I've only read two -- are true poems, whatever.  I think Ted Kooser is a lyric poet, often -- and I adore his work.  Jonathan
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  Re: Branching Out
« Reply #2 on: September 15, 2007, 03:41:00 PM » by Michael Firewalker
it is a litany of local good-hearts, and it edifies this jaded old reader into thinking that maybe there's even a few other places like this in this hell-hole, kiss-ass of a country...

michael
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  Re: Branching Out
« Reply #3 on: September 15, 2007, 08:24:36 PM » by Rick Stansberger
Jonathan,

Thanks for your kind responses to this and to the other Stark poem! I like Hardy.  "Convergence of the Twain" is one of my favorite poems.  James Merrill said that you imprint on a certain language and then you're stuck with it the rest of your life.  He wrote in the dialect of cultured New York.  I write in the dialect of the American Midwest.  I like story, so I write a lot of narratives.  People where I grew up often told stories as a way to make a point.  Sometimes they'd leave out the point to see if you were smart enough to get it.  If you weren't, they might not bother making the point.  So stories often come to me for telling, and I oblige them. 

If by lyrics you mean spontaneous outpourings of powerful emotion, well, I like understatement.  As long as the reader feels the emotion, it's OK iby me if the words are quiet.
Logged

Words . . . will not stay in place,
Will not stay still.

—T. S. Eliot

  Re: Branching Out
« Reply #4 on: September 15, 2007, 08:45:00 PM » by Jonathan Bracker
I too like understatement and these two by you are I guess understated but they have much emotion, and because the author cared enough and wrote well enough, I too care about the people and their stories.  I look forward to reading more by you.  I found Merrill's remark helpful; I write, often, in what might be called a "mannered" way, just as I speak that way often; that's me, that's who I am.  And there is much about my voice, in life and in poetry, that I have come to enjoy.  I love individual styles in art... is there any good art without it?  ...only Thomas Hardy, I guess, would have written "smalled in the distance" -- there is a story that in late life, he wondered about the word and looked it up in the dictionary, only to find his use of it quoted!
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 (Read 381 times) [1]
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